Yes I completely agree I don’t use it and when someone does - I start to avoid them. I don’t want my daughter thinking it’s ever okay to use and have had several talks with her about men and boys who use that term - stay away from them - run far far away.
I really appreciate this. Thank you. By way of contrast, keep an ear out for how often men are called “gentleman”, even in circumstances where they most certainly could not be considered “gentlemen.”
Yep...thanks for writing this. The word is everywhere in pop culture and it is like a slap there and in real life. It's meant to be a slap we have to pretend isn't hostile.
Thank you so much! Beautifully written and said. I love how you are so clear and such a good writer, with none of the academic posturing too many use to assert privilege. No way to argue against the truth so well-spoken! (I don't pay much attention to famous men in the media, but recently had see that Dog referred to as if he's an ally, which I would never trust, but the photo of "his" women on leashed, exposed, shows him to be just another oppressive female-hating man.)
Thank you so much, Bev! 🌺 I also appreciate this feedback-I really hate academic language lol and I like that my work is clear and accessible, even with my rich vocabulary. ✍🏾✨
To be fair, this photo of Snoop was from 2003, long before he supposedly announced changing his attitudes towards women. I don’t follow him, but I don’t really see any evidence that this is the case, even if he did stop calling us bitches in his music.
Men who claim they are former misogynists tend to continue being misogynists, they just repackage it in a different way. At least this is the case, most of the time.
I so agree. Never to be trusted again. And yes, your vocabulary is rich, and powerful.
Direct and clear is the best. You and me and a few others of us are carrying on the tradition of Radical Lesbian Feminism and Lesbian Separatism that I first met as just Lesbian Feminism where we tried to be as accessible as possible, wary of anyone with degrees or power over, or using word salad or just posturing with their privilege. I think of the changes as being the taking over by the class privileged who pretend they don't know they are. Most poetry is boring to me, but when I think back to who was the most impressive and clear and moving, with no mistaking what she was saying, it was Pat Parker, in our own community here. Black class-oppressed Butch who was also such a powerful speaker when she read her work at our local Lesbian events. What an honor to have known her!
I am late to this article. Snoop Dog has really succeeded in reforming his image from that of a man who drags black women around on chains. They ate him up at the Olympics. It was so annoying.
I hate the word "bitch" even for female dogs, so I am glad my breeder refers to the female as the "dam." Although mostly she uses the name of the dog.
But the word is beyond normalized. My best friend gave me a mug that said "bad bitch" on it. She gave it to a bunch of women in her inner circle. They all loved it. She is one of my closest friends of over 25 years, so I won't be distancing myself from her. Plus then I would have to distance myself from everyone except my mom. Most of the time I do tell people why I hate that word.
Yes I completely agree I don’t use it and when someone does - I start to avoid them. I don’t want my daughter thinking it’s ever okay to use and have had several talks with her about men and boys who use that term - stay away from them - run far far away.
I really appreciate this. Thank you. By way of contrast, keep an ear out for how often men are called “gentleman”, even in circumstances where they most certainly could not be considered “gentlemen.”
Thank you 🌺 Yes, I have noticed!
“Gentlemens club” 🤮
Yep...thanks for writing this. The word is everywhere in pop culture and it is like a slap there and in real life. It's meant to be a slap we have to pretend isn't hostile.
I agree...it is so hostile and some of us are not desensitized. Thank you for reading 🌺
Thank you so much! Beautifully written and said. I love how you are so clear and such a good writer, with none of the academic posturing too many use to assert privilege. No way to argue against the truth so well-spoken! (I don't pay much attention to famous men in the media, but recently had see that Dog referred to as if he's an ally, which I would never trust, but the photo of "his" women on leashed, exposed, shows him to be just another oppressive female-hating man.)
Thank you so much, Bev! 🌺 I also appreciate this feedback-I really hate academic language lol and I like that my work is clear and accessible, even with my rich vocabulary. ✍🏾✨
To be fair, this photo of Snoop was from 2003, long before he supposedly announced changing his attitudes towards women. I don’t follow him, but I don’t really see any evidence that this is the case, even if he did stop calling us bitches in his music.
Men who claim they are former misogynists tend to continue being misogynists, they just repackage it in a different way. At least this is the case, most of the time.
I so agree. Never to be trusted again. And yes, your vocabulary is rich, and powerful.
Direct and clear is the best. You and me and a few others of us are carrying on the tradition of Radical Lesbian Feminism and Lesbian Separatism that I first met as just Lesbian Feminism where we tried to be as accessible as possible, wary of anyone with degrees or power over, or using word salad or just posturing with their privilege. I think of the changes as being the taking over by the class privileged who pretend they don't know they are. Most poetry is boring to me, but when I think back to who was the most impressive and clear and moving, with no mistaking what she was saying, it was Pat Parker, in our own community here. Black class-oppressed Butch who was also such a powerful speaker when she read her work at our local Lesbian events. What an honor to have known her!
This makes me smile. Thank you, Bev. 🌺🙏🏾
Thank you too! I'm so glad you exist and are doing such important writing!
Oh! I love your cultural critiques so much! I had never thought of this before. I thought this was really insightful. Thank you!
Aww, Thank you so much 🥰🌺✨
I am late to this article. Snoop Dog has really succeeded in reforming his image from that of a man who drags black women around on chains. They ate him up at the Olympics. It was so annoying.
I hate the word "bitch" even for female dogs, so I am glad my breeder refers to the female as the "dam." Although mostly she uses the name of the dog.
But the word is beyond normalized. My best friend gave me a mug that said "bad bitch" on it. She gave it to a bunch of women in her inner circle. They all loved it. She is one of my closest friends of over 25 years, so I won't be distancing myself from her. Plus then I would have to distance myself from everyone except my mom. Most of the time I do tell people why I hate that word.
How about:
-You went snowboarding today? So, how was the snow?
“Totally bitchin’”
-Right on!
No. & Blocked.