26 Comments

"It’s the modern trans movement that has brainwashed young people into believing that their lack of stereotypical conformity makes them a whole different gender." 💯

For all the faults of the 90s, at least I was allowed to play with toy trucks and action figures without being told it meant I was really a boy...I feel sorry for other gender non-conforming folks these days.

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That same line really struck me as well.

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Thank you so much for this post. It's so important. That girl will never recover from the hormones, and the surgery could kill her. I'm just reading Cher's memoir and she's also publicly apologized for thinking her daughter was a girl. But I can't not think that she's relieved that her Lesbian daughter (who she so fought against being a Lesbian) is no longer a Lesbian but a worshipped "man" and trans. I wonder for Sade and so many others too, is it more of a thrill to day "my son" instead of "my daughter." And for the girls, how much better treatment they get for being "trans" than a hated Lesbian. They are erasing us so quickly, but yes, many of these girls and women are het.

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Hi Bev, thank you so much. Wow I did not know about Cher. You make some really important points about the thrill of being able to claim a son instead of a daughter. I never thought about that but sadly a lot of us have ingrained ideas about which is more valuable, including with butch lesbians vs trans. Very sad.

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Thank you too, N3VLYNNN.

Yes, it's shocking. I once saw a video at a Lesbian variety show where a Lesbian's son (maybe ten years old?) who was wearing a cap and jacket and sturdy shoes and trousers shoved a girl to the floor (likely another Lesbian's daughter), who was smaller and wearing a flimsy dress. And then he shoved his face into her vulval area while she begged, "no, don't, please stop..." and the audience was laughing and cheering. It was a horrible sexual assault. I've also heard of a women's land where a 5 year old boy raped a three year old girl and the girl and her mother got no support and left.

I'll never understand it, but it explains so much.

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What?! Yeah, boys get away with so much and it’s easier when they are younger. I am an avid memoir reader and it’s extremely common for young girls to be sexually assaulted by other young boys, with no one to listen to them.

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It's horrific. I would think Lesbians mostly wouldn't do this, and I think mostly are much better at even holding their own sons accountable, but I'm guessing few girls escape some kind of sexual assault from boys and all get sexually harassed.

I like memoirs too. I should do one. Your posts are like a continous memoir.

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Thank you! I feel so, as well about this blog. I love writing memoir. 🌺

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You're inspiring me that it could be in pieces as opposed to the entire book, and then the pieces become a book!

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"It’s the modern trans movement that has brainwashed young people into believing that their lack of stereotypical conformity makes them a whole different gender."

Talk about a truth bomb! 💣💣💣

It's all the more impactful that you accompany that truth with compassion for Sade and all moms showing "support" for their children out of love and a sincere desire to do the right thing.

There must also, in these moms, be some latent hope in the idea that "Well, my daughter won't have to bear the same scars I did going through the world as a female."

I received the announcement about this album (because I write about music) and my heart sank a little. But I wasn't surprised. This kind of rhetoric around gender has completely captured the arts. It's been so chilling to watch creative people mindlessly repeat the exact SAME phrases, as if all of music had turned in a mass cult.

I felt bad asking the publicist to send the music and liner notes without letting-on that I don't buy into the premise for the album. In my corner of media, there's still the widespread assumption that "well, if you're a good person and not some barbarian, you're onboard with this."

I have an idea of how I can discuss this album compassionately while also not mincing words, but it's great to see an example of that in your writing.

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"This kind of rhetoric around gender has completely captured the arts. It's been so chilling to watch creative people mindlessly repeat the exact SAME phrases, as if all of music had turned in a mass cult."

Yes, and yes!! Tell me about me about it. I am completely immersed in the arts, so I know what you mean.

Thank you so much for sharing your impressions and appreciation. 🌺 There are definitely ways to speak about these issues firmly and with compassion. I think it all comes down to authenticity.

If you have the compassion in your heart and a willingness to express your truth, it will come out anyway. Anybody who doesn't see your intentions, that is on them. Good luck!

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So sad and so depressing. In a way she’s made something that feels ‘tragic’ in her beautiful poignant voice. But what is the tragic, romantic thing that she’s projecting onto her daughter? Just being a tomboy perhaps. God knows what actual tragedy will transpire to the poor girl’s body after being on testosterone for a few years. Why not be sadly romantic about girls elsewhere, with her beautiful voice. Situations that require real courage or support. Girls prevented from going to school in Afghanistan, or children in situations of danger. So depressing.

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Thank you for this.

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Very sad. A young woman who will never be a male despite a sprinkling of facial hair and ruining her voice permanently. She is not affirming but destroying her body. She will be infertile, anorgasmic, on pharmaceuticals forever with a myriad of serious complications. That’s her reality.

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Sade was my homegirl, growing up in the same town at a time when the music industry was dominated by sexist creeps obsessed with youth. I guess not much has changed. If she hadn't made a record on this topic, would we have heard about it at all? How many women artists who broke through in the 1980's still have careers?

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I feel this so much. Thanks 🙏

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Thank you!

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Oh, no! Not Sade! I love her music. So tragic.

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This is heartbreaking.

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I had no idea Sade was well known in America! I've been a fan since "No ordinary love", and this is so disappointing. I hope the gender dam breaks before this child is medicated.

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Yeah, saw an article a while ago regarding her "trans" kid...Another one bites the dust.

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Can we talk about not giving moms more to feel guilty about? It seems like she loves her child with her whole heart and let's face it, so many people don't have that from one parent or the other or both and neglectful, hateful parents do so much damage, trans or not.

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Girl, please! ✋🏾 I even made a disclaimer about the fact that I'm not blaming Sade, and I had mentioned that she is trying to be a good Mom. Sounds like you are just projecting and did not even read this essay, as brief as it was. Just because someone is well-intentioned does not mean they are above accountability.

Yes, she loves her child AND she is wrong, AND it's okay for me to talk about it, especially when she is promoting that toxic ideology to the world through her music.

Two things can be true at once.

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Please excuse. I didn't mean to imply YOU were shaming her. I was talking more about the implication that not "seeing it sooner" is getting to the point that its being called child abuse when it could just be letting a child be a child.

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Oh, my bad!! Thank you for clarifying 🙏🏾 Yes, I also touched on that-there is so much shaming towards parents who are just doing right by their child.

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Children can no more "consent" to have their healthy breasts and genitalia removed or take puberty blockers than they can "consent" to have sex with an adult.

Similarly, parents and doctors can no more approve such permanent mutilation simply because a minor child desires it than they can approve their participation in pedophilia.

Ultimately society will see the truth and ban the practice as we have banned female genital mutilation. Do people support that practice if the parents consent? I truly hope not

It is monstrous to believe otherwise and those who do will ultimately be held to account for their actions. The obscene bureaucrat Rachel (Richard) Levine among those in the dock.

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