Now that I am finally getting back in touch with my sexuality, I realize that my libido is pretty low. At least, it’s not nearly as high as it used to be.
Part of that is because I suppressed my sexuality a great deal while I was living with my abusive family. I didn’t feel like I was in a safe or suitable place to fully explore my own body, much less have a sexual relationship with anyone else.
I was also spending an intolerable amount of time living in a sickeningly wokie-doke, white liberal town where I rarely came across anyone I was even remotely attracted to. So, this part of my body was very much placed on ice...to be defrosted and enjoyed at a much later date.
For myself—and for women in general—the most important organ in our arousal is the brain. We have to feel safe, relaxed, emotionally stimulated, and attracted in order to get fully aroused. Our imagination needs to run wild.
This is why I have had so many wet dreams where I’ve literally woken up cumming over visions that weren't even graphically sexual. Beyonce catwalking towards me in a trippy tunnel? Beyonce straddling me on a yacht? Time to bust a nut!
This is also why erotica is such a big hit with women. We love the storylines, the buildup, the tête-a-tête. That extensive sensual mindfuck is all part of building up to a long, explosive orgasm.
For me, I notice how much my libido spikes when I am in a sexual relationship. Most notably, when I’m away from my partner, I just tend to feel hornier, because my body stores those memories of the pleasure we shared together, and it becomes active in my psyche.
There are also visions of what we could share in the future that feel safe and realistic to explore. It feels easier to access arousal and orgasm, because I have so much inspiration.
So…I was thinking…maybe I can kickstart my self-pleasure journey by getting into a sexual relationship (tee hee!)
Most specifically…with a femme of a particular shape.
